Moms Talk: Having Your Kids Help Around The House

Everyone's had the unpleasant experience of getting swamped with work. It's always good to have a pair of helping hands, and sometimes children are eager to help in this regard. Other times, it's a little bit more of a task. What are the best ways to get children to help out around the house, and what chores are best for them to try out? Shannon Brenek takes a look at the conversation here, and we'll be having a live chat from 2 p.m. to 3 p.m. in the comments. Refresh the page to see new remarks.

Shannon Brenek:

Getting kids to help out around the house is a real chore. In theory it’s supposed to make your life a lot easier, but in reality, it’s just one more thing to add to your list of frustrations! I’ve tried it all: sticker charts, bribes, punishments (ahem), screaming, yelling, pulling my hair out….you name it. What I usually end up doing is just waiting till the house is empty and then doing a clean sweep. The problem with “If you want something done right, do it yourself” is that kids (and husbands) don’t learn to do it right, ever. They know if they hold out long enough someone will do it for them. And your life never gets easier. That is, unless you just give up and learn to enjoy a messy house and lots of unfinished business. Those people are out there.

Since I am only one of those people for a limited time, before I realize the insanity around me…I do have a few tricks. My favorite is the rewarding system. I don’t know about you, but my kids always want something. Right now the coveted toy is a Bruder Garbage Truck. It is mentioned not only daily, but hourly with videos from YouTube and pictures from the Bruder website as supporting documents of what wonderful toys they can provide along with hours of fun.

I’m sure there are all sorts of variations on this theme: Electronics, designer clothes….

Enter my bright idea: 

My need these days is for clothes and toys to not be strewn on bedroom floors, and under-4-footers to be dressed in time for school with minimal yelling. Sounds simple right? This is where the item of desire comes in. Make them work for it. We all have to work for the things we want in life. And quite honestly, if toys are strewn across the floor and not respected, then why on earth would your child get more toys? So my plan is to go buy that Bruder Garbage truck, put it on the fridge and commence operation “let’s all help out” (ie: do what I say before I start going berserk).

Set the ground rules. Explain the goal and the reason behind it. Decide what will be enough time for the new chores to become a habit. And go! And at the end of it, reward them with the realization that a job well done really does pay off.

As a side note:

You don’t always have to buy something. The reward could be anything….a playdate, an extended curfew for bringing out the garbage. And in the end, they don’t only get the understanding that if they work hard they “get something” but also that the home becomes more harmonious when everyone pitches in, and Mom and/or Dad aren’t going berserk.