The Bachelor, 8 p.m., ABC

So, one of the rejects from a Bachelorette is here to exact his revenge on womankind. Kids, it won’t last. I’m just sayin’.

Celebrity Wife Swap, 10 p.m., ABC

I used to love that show Wife Swap. I know. I hate myself for even saying it out loud. And then last year CBS briefly had that show in which someone with a celebrity name got to swap lives with the famous person. I loved that too. I know, I know, I’m creepy. Which leads me to this: I am totally watching this, even though I think it is gross that they traded a former anorexic (Tracey Gold) with a woman who has had gastric bypass surgery (Carnie Wilson) and struggled with being overweight her whole life.

Celebrity Slimdowns: Losing The Weight, 9 p.m., E!

It’s really easy when you have a chef and a trainer and you pay people to force you to do things.